And then there was one...

Hello.

Two weeks ago all four of my chicks lived in my nest with me and my husband. Our nest was very full, very active and very...well, nice. That was two weeks ago.

Tonight, I sit at my computer, listening to chick #4 singing in the shower. He has had a very hard two weeks watching chick #1, #2 and #3 fly off to bigger and different nests.

Having two families under one roof, as ours is, opens us up to these unusual situations. My first three chicks are at least 12 years older than the little guy singing in the shower. Each of my daughters (#2 & #3) have gone to college. They will return home on school breaks.

My eldest son though, well, he left to live in a group home, for good. Chick #1, as he is referred to here, will not be coming home on any breaks.

Chick #1 and little shower guy watched cartoons together and played video games. They shot baskets and #1 gave #4 pointers in soccer. The two of them had fun together, and fought like cats and dogs when they got into each other's space. Now it is silent.

Last night my youngest said he was sad that his brother was gone. I told him that I was sad too. Then I told him that it is hard to feel sad, but the older we get and the more mature we become, we learn to separate our sad feelings when we know glad feelings live near by. We have to let our heart feel the sad stuff for saying good bye to our brother (son) and at the same time feel glad that our brother (son) is happy in his new home.

I know this is hard for him to understand. It's hard for me to accept. But we've known for six years this day would come. Yet when I open my cupboard and see #1's empty jar where his special treats used to be, I get choked up.

But hope is where I need to reside. Hope that #1 will grow into his new life with his new roommates. That he will experience new adventures and go to bed every night loving his new life. Hope of a better future for him is where I focus my thoughts.

As for this nest, I have great hopes as well.

I hope that my remaining son, here at home, will learn to express his sadness and develop language to share gladness about the move in the future. I hope he will figure out how to mold a new relationship with his big brother from a short distance away. I hope he will grow to be aware of how special times are, when we are all together again...and I hold hope that little chick #4 will continue to sing to his heart's content in the shower.

Life is good...although sometimes a little sad.

Have hope,
Donna